Screw you, Shell!

Keith Gable — Thu, 17 Feb 2011 09:11:00 -0600

I wrote in to Shell Customer Care to attempt to find if they have any premium Diesel in Tulsa, since I can’t get biodiesel in the “Oil Capital”. Shell does have premium Diesel - you can get it at several stations in Fort Smith, AR (one I know of for sure is the Massard Rd Shell across from Wal-Mart on Zero St). Premium Diesel costs 8-12 cents more than regular Diesel, but I get a lot more miles per gallon (42-48 vs 34-37).

Since premium Diesel is slightly obscure, it would make sense that their retail location locator doesn’t have an option for it (it doesn’t have E85 either). QuikTrip’s locator doesn’t even have Diesel as a filter option. The difference is that QuikTrip’s support people gave me a list of locations when I wrote in. Here’s what I wrote Shell to attempt to get QuikTrip-like service in determining what (if any) stations offer premium Diesel:

Hello,

I’m trying to see if Shell Premium Diesel is available in or around Tulsa, OK (ZIP 74112). I believe this is branded as V-Power Diesel.

Thanks!

I’m pretty sure that the people they pay to answer questions understand about 6 words in English, and around 30 words in any language, because they replied with this:

Dear KEITH GABLE,

Thank you for taking the time to contact the Shell Customer Care Center.

This is in response to your request for assistance in locating Shell branded retail stations. Locations can be found on our website: www.localshell.com. Please check the diesel box and add the city and state or zip code for the list of Shell station who serves diesel.

If you need to plan a trip, please utilize the route planner option on the left side of the screen at www.localshell.com. With this function you may locate all the Shell stations along your route.

We thank you for your patronage. If you need further assistance please contact our Shell Solutions Center at 1-888-GO-Shell (1-888-467-4355).

Sincerely, Shell Customer Care

Thanks for reading my e-mail, guys! I wrote you guys after spending quite a bit of time searching your site, and already came across that locator. So, I wrote them back and told them that. Then they replied:

Dear KEITH GABLE:

Thank you for your communication.

This is in response to your email regarding your inquiry of the Shell Staion in Tulsa OK that offers Premium Diesel.

Please be advised that due to system limitation our www.localshell.com can only provide you with stations that offers Diesel.

We appreciate the opportunity to serve you in this matter and look forward to providing you with quality Shell branded products and service in the future. If you have need further assistance, please contact Shell Solutions Center at 1-888-GO-SHELL (1-888-467- 4355).

Sincerely, Shell Customer Care

In other words, “if we can’t find it on the same site you can find it on, then we’re not going to ask someone to look it up for you”. Thanks for the fucking effort. I’m sure the station owner likes that you guys aren’t sending business to them as well. Seriously, how do these miserable assholes become customer support specialists? Someone at QuikTrip should either school these guys, or decide to offer premium Diesel. Of course, my real preference would be for CountryMark to open some locations in Oklahoma, but that’s never going to happen :)

The Ignition Project: Screw you, Shell!

Screw you, Shell!